When to Compare Yourself to Someone Else
If you've taken a NoCo class, you've heard me say that comparisons are at the root of most (if not all) complaints. In fact, at its core, a complaint is a comparison between some ideal alternative and the reality of what is happening.
Is that a complaint? -- Your intentions will tell you.
One of the most common NoCo questions I get is, "Is that a complaint?" It can be difficult to tell sometimes. And I've worked with several of you who are trying to eliminate all negativity from your conversations, but tough situations come up almost daily that put this resolve to the test.
Is that true?
When I get into my blacker moods, I spin into absolutist thinking. I start using terms like "always" and "never" about whatever situation I'm in or whoever I'm thinking about.
I decided not to worry about it
This morning I took a yoga class from the amazing and insightful Kimber Simpkins. Every class she brings in a theme, some thoughts to hold in your head while you're doing the poses. These are Big Thoughts, the kinds of Thoughts that work their way under your skin and stick around for a while.
What's the point?
When you fail at something you said you wanted to accomplish, what do you do?
Do you beat yourself up over it? Does your inner critic start insulting you? Do you think about giving up? Do you use it as further evidence of how you can't stick to anything?
Complaining Erodes Productivity
Looks like the buzz about how complaining impacts productivity is getting farther into mainstream business! Check out these articles in Inc. Magazine and the Wall St. Journal to see what I mean.
Optimism & Realism
Sometimes people say "I can't get too optimistic. I have to stay realistic." Is it true that optimists are always unrealistic?
Heading Off the Winter Blues
Winter blues? In August?!? You may think that it's early (or even absurd) to think about winter at the beginning of August. But if you're someone who suffers from the blues during the winter (a.k.a., Seasonal Affective Disorder), this is exactly the right time to start preparing your defenses.
Sharing Thanks
Is there someone in your life who's made an impact on you that you haven't yet thanked? How about taking a moment today to express your thanks? The impact could be large or small. Is there someone you encounter in your daily routine who always has a smile for you?
The Old Complaint
Often when someone is complaining they’re talking about how they felt some other time, not now. They are describing a past event that made them feel frustrated or angry or hurt.
The Vague Complaint
The vague complaint is either about something so big and complex that there’s no single or direct solution, or about something that’s simply impossible to change. We hear vague complaints all the time.
Contemplating the Pet Peeve
A “pet peeve” is defined as a minor annoyance, something that irritates you but often doesn’t seem to bother anyone else. It also refers to an annoyance that occurs frequently or repeatedly.